By:
Priscilla A. Wainwright, Ph.D., CPC
Here’s the 3rd
member of the Holy Trinity among the 5 Power Sources. These three overlap and are highly related.
3.
EMPATHY
I once saw a poster that I thought was the perfect
definition of empathy. It read, “When
you cry, I taste salt”.
Empathy is the
ability to put yourself in another’s shoes, to be so in touch that you have
intuitive and emotional understanding of what another person is experiencing
and feeling. One can understand another
person’s experience and emotion rationally and intellectually, but this is only
partial understanding and therefore not true Empathy. True Empathy, at its fullest, involves a
felt emotional connection between two people.
Empathic (not “empathetic”) communication is the ability
to express in your own words to another what that other must be feeling and
experiencing in such a way that the other feels fully understood.
Clearly, reason and factual knowledge and personal
experience are powerful aids to one’s ability to be empathic. But there is more: The right-brained “gut reaction” that we
women tend to experience more fully than men.
Sidebar: About “power” – Male power tends to be more
authority-based. I can give orders due
to my position, experience, superior knowledge, etc. Female power is typically more “influence”
based. I don’t need necessarily to be
the boss or formal leader. My power
comes through interpersonal connection.
Empathy, and empathic communication add the power of deep
Human Connection to the BIG
THREE. All “success” is social; no one
holds interpersonal power which is not granted by others. Preach or command all you want. If others don’t listen or follow, what
power do you really have? (only the
power to create hot air!).
Empathy, then, adds the magic social touch to your
Emotion and Intuition when others are involved.
Emotion = added data, deeper feeling.
Intuition = higher wisdom
Empathy = Emotional and Intuitive connection.
The demonstration of empathy adds considerable social
power through the feeling of bonding which is created when one feels fully or
properly understood by another. Empathy
boosts Influence.
Empathy’s handmaiden is Compassion. Compassion is also a significant Female
Power Source, but I include it under Empathy for our discussion.
Compassion fuels Empathy and is often the driving force
behind it. Empathy is the
“understanding”, Compassion is often the reason that Empathy is expressed in
the first place.
We’ve wrapped up the Big Three. On to Power Source Four in my next blog.
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NEWS FLASH! Simply Woman ezine has just published my article, "7 Ways To Command The Respect You Deserve". Here's the link:
http://www.simplywoman.com/7-ways-to-command-the-respect-you-deserve/
ALSO, every day I post a "Pris's Pick-Me-Up" on my Facebook page. Check it out.
Have a Frabjous Day!
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