By Priscilla A. Wainwright, Ph.D, CPC
Girl, it’s a few days into January. Has the motivational dust begun to settle
yet? This time of year we get so
bombarded with motivational hype.
We make a big deal over New Years. We make all kinds of promises, we turn over
new leaves – and by February 18, they’ve all turned to mush, right?
Well, I’m proposing a SANE, Woman-Friendly way to make this
year your best ever.
Here we go!
1. Forget resolutions and goals. These tend to be fixed and time-limited. So often we set them as targets, but we have
no specified daily plan to get there. We
too often rely on Dumb-Ass Magical Thinking to make them come true. So, forget it.
2.
Set powerful Intentions. Intentions have more to do with your destiny,
your direction and path in life. Rather
than say, “I’m going to lose 10 pounds by Valentine’s Day”, and starving
yourself, say, “I’m dedicated to improving my physical and mental health”, or
words to that effect.
Goals are about Achievement and
Accomplishment. They’re a very
Male-Model way of approaching change.
They’re fine to have, and in some endeavors they’re essential. But for a woman’s personal purposes,
Intentions are often better. Intentions
are about Growth and Development. While
goals are time-limited and deadline-oriented, Intentions are Ongoing and
Developmental.
Goals push us; Intentions pull us and honor
movement at our own pace. Both, however,
have a certain imperative about them, of course, but the imperative of
Intentions is female-friendly and honors a woman’s personal style and movement.
3.
Think developmentally. Honey, we are all “Works In
Progress”. It’s a much saner,
female-friendly way of approaching life.
If I really want to scare myself and
paralyze action, all I have to do is think of all I “have to” accomplish this
year. Then I pressure myself, worry, and
lose sleep. Want chronic anxiety? The best way is to live in the future in your
head all the time and concern yourself with being/doing perfect. That’s the recipe for feeling overwhelmed.
Want a cure for overwhelm? Shift mental gears and just focus on the next
step! Step by step you’ll get there!
“Development” is ongoing and honors each
step. It takes pleasure and satisfaction
in the process itself.
I’ve peak-performance coached so many
athletes and businesspeople who suspend their satisfaction with practice until
the outcome. If they win or do well, then
they let themselves feel satisfaction in the prep work after the fact. The
Development mindset lets you feel satisfaction in small, daily gains. It lets
you find Joy in the Journey.
4.
Embrace the Larger Truth that the Universe
conspires to do you good, that you are loved by the Cosmos, who is waiting for
you to happen. The Universe, as well as
your friends, family, and colleagues, - and your Intentions – are the Wind
Beneath Your Wings.
Truly, you are a Treasure Trove of
talents, capabilities, skills, wisdom, and great qualities. Your mood is determined by your focus. Therefore….
5.
Stop criticizing yourself; start
complimenting yourself. Focus on
what you have, not what you lack. Notice
how your positive qualities play out in your life. Take time to stop and appreciate yourself
and your true Beauty and Glory. You are
Glorious, Girlfriend. Act accordingly,
whether you see it or not. Your true radiance will shine brighter.
6.
Write out a Power Statement embracing
your intentions and the Larger Truth.
Make it strong with emotionally compelling language. Post it in several places that you frequent
often and where you’ll see it, eg., your bathroom mirror, your computer, your
kitchen perhaps. Read it several times
daily. Perhaps record it and play it back to yourself.
Here’s an example.
“I am a gifted and inspired writer and coach. The Universe conspires
toward my success. I am loved by God(dess) and protected. I receive just what I need when I need it,
and the world longs for what I have to offer.
I manifest wealth in many forms and am wondrously blessed, and am a
blessing to others….” Funny how it
works. The more you think this way, the
more the statement comes true, and the more you attract.
7.
Make this your year of greater self-love and
respect, Tigress! Using all the
above tips, dedicate yourself to putting you at the head of your list. Care for and nurture yourself first and
foremost. Only then can you be your best
for the ones you love.
This ain’t any ego trip, Girlfriend. It’s the way to Sister Sanity! Say “No” more often, set and keep healthy
boundaries, and find ways to nurture your self daily.
You will grow, flourish, and your inner
Feminine Radiance and Glory will shine forth with much greater glow!
Welcome, Sister, to 2014!
(Psst…. Let’s not forget
that we overestimate what we can get done in a day, and underestimate what we
can accomplish in a year. Also, “New
Year” is only a time convention. What’s
really happened on January 1 is that we have just gone from one day into the
next, just like every day. So what! Does that help?)
About Priscilla
Priscilla has 40 years as a psychologist and life and career
coach to women on the rise. She is also Founder of www.ScarvesStyleAndGlory.com, where
Fashion, Style, and Empowerment unite!
She is also owner of www.MyBigDiscountMall.com,
“Where America comes to shop”.- 49 major stores in 1 click! How convenient!
You can get FREE weekly Style Tips on the home page of
ScarvesStyleAndGlory.
Pris also has an 8 – session individual Destiny Coaching
special going on until January 20th.
Contact her at
pris@ScarvesStyleAndGlory.com
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